Guest Post | Joalena Moore
After my marriage ended, I found myself feeling lost and striving to find happiness. Through a number of different avenues, I was able to cultivate self love and find joy again. These 7 Tips For Finding Happiness after Divorce I’d like to share that were paramount for me in finding happiness after love loss. My wish is this may help you along your journey back to happiness.
1. Let love heal
Allow the time to grieve the loss of the relationship. It’s going to take work to let go and process the loss. Journaling your thoughts can be quite cathartic. Be gentle and give yourself the space to heal and feel. You must first let yourself be sad; in order to rise from the ashes like a phoenix.
2. Lean on your friends
This may be your saving grace. My girlfriends were everything to me during this difficult time. If you’re feeling down, reach out to your funniest and most supportive friends. The ones that will listen and let you cry on their shoulder, and make you laugh hysterically. Go out with your buddies and catch some live music, a play or a comedy show. Laughing with friends is the best medicine!
3. Spend time alone
This is probably the last thing you will feel like doing after your relationship ends, but I promise you, it’s what you need. When we spend so much of our time in a relationship with another person, our identity can get wrapped up into that person and separating from it can be really hard. Being alone may make you feel anxious at first, but you have to sit with yourself to get to know who you are as an individual without that other person. You might discover some amazing things!
4. Get out of your comfort zone
I highly recommend traveling. After my separation, I traveled solo for 2 months in a foreign country. It was seriously the best thing I’ve ever done for myself in my life! It was exhilarating, scary and uncomfortable. Traveling alone in a country where I didn’t know anyone and didn’t speak the language was something that I never thought I would be capable of doing. After I completed my soul searching walkabout, my happiness and confidence increased exponentially. Proving to yourself that you’re more capable and adaptable than you ever thought will help you feel stronger and happier. If traveling isn’t your thing, then do something else that challenges you and mixes things up a bit. “Life Begins At The End of Your Comfort Zone.” – Neale Donald Walsch
5. Find a community
Pick hobbies that you enjoy and join any public groups you feel drawn to: take a class, try knitting, join a book club, sports, hiking group, yoga etc. Community will help you feel supported and give you something positive to focus on. We all need support. Finding like-minded awesome people will open your world up and help you feel less lonely. You will find joy in your tribe. I found my tribe in my local acroyoga community. They lifted me up and helped me to fly.
6. Ignite your soul
As you are rediscovering who are you without a partner, why not delve deeper and uncover your passion in life? It’s possible you may have sacrificed something in order to please your ex or maybe there’s something you’ve dreamed of doing your whole life, but never gave yourself permission to try. If you’re unsure of your passion, take a deep breath, close your eyes and ask yourself, “What lights the spark inside my heart?”
7. Go to Therapy
I know what you’re thinking, “Do I really need therapy?” The answer simply is…yes. It is one of the most important tools to assist you in processing the loss of your relationship. It will help you to move on and find happiness.
Joalena Moore is the founder of Heal with Me and is a certified holistic life coach, sound healer, reiki practitioner and licensed massage therapist. Her passion is to help people find happiness and balance through wellness and holistic therapies, inspiring the soul to connect, heal and grow.
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